Need somewhere to cool off in this record-breaking heat? Today, we explore where you can take a dip in our very own town. From the casual plunger to the everyday dipper, to the potential lawbreaker, we have a body of water for you.
No risk
Yateley’s Health and Fitness swimming pool is open all day, allowing both families and hardcore breaststrokers to enjoy the sweet taste of chlorine, simultaneously or separately, with the night swim being an option for solitary divers. The cons are numerous: the lack of sunlight, small size, and young children per capita. So, if you’re a lane swimmer or anyone over the age of 13, this wouldn’t be my top choice.
Low risk
Horseshoe Lake is technically not within the Yateley border, at the time of writing, despite being promised to us long ago. Either way, the Yarbler will begin the first step in accelerating tensions by writing about it here. To dip in the lake, one unfortunately must book ahead, but only for 9 pounds each. Wow. A wetsuit is advised, and the sense of privacy is low. Watch out for the ruthless scouts in their kayaks, wiping out local swimmers in their 10s. If you’re seeking thrills, you can attempt to conquer the central island, where hundreds of birds will welcome you with open beaks.
High risk
Positioned off of Cricket Hill, the secluded Wyndhams Pond offers potentially dangerous still water, seasonally angry swans, and slightly unnerving fishermen you’re not quite sure you should approach. Legally, it’s illegal. But back in the day this place had a diving board, and was a proper hotspot for locals.
Perilous
I wouldn’t recommend the pond on Yateley Green, but for completionists you can enjoy a shallow still patch of water, which, according to Yateley Town Council, is ‘not fit for human recreation’. One of the few pluses in this extremely public location is the lack of any aquatic life besides the odd bird – although walking without stepping on all manner of footballs, tennis balls and other substances could prove challenging. Risk definitely outweighs reward (also likely illegal), but when it’s this hot, you can plead heat stroke, insanity or the greater risk of drying out like a grape in the sun.
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